EXCUSES…. you DON’T belong here anymore!!

Week 1 back on it and I’ll be honest it’s not been going well…

I feel like I’m just making excuses every day, we don’t have a proper functional kitchen yet as there’s still so much furniture to build and boxes to unpack and i’m working and can’t be bothered to cook and it’s take a ways and pizza and chip shop…

I’m missing friends, some more than others, i hate my job ( but have applied for other jobs) I bought a shirt today for my interview next week, it’s 1.5 sizes bigger than I normally wear as it’s 1, not stretchy and 2, I have BOOBS… the rest of the top looks like a tent 😦

There’s one person in particular I’m missing, so much so all I can think about is trying to find a way to go back and visit them. but it seems like a million miles away and I know there will come a day when they won’t want to talk to me anymore, which when you’re 180 miles away is completely understandable.

I feel like I’m dropping into a pit, a bit where I hate where I am, who I am and all I want to do is lay in bed, watch A Little Princess and completely stuff myself silly with chocolate. which is not going to help me one bit, my weight upsets me, i get upset i just want to stuff myself and we end up in this horrible vicious circle all over again.

I’m just making constant excuses for myself and the only reason my weight isn’t going up is because of the amount of activity I have been doing. although I’ve been dropped down to 16 hours, over 4 days (urgh…) the walk from home to the station and from the station to work has really boosted my steps…

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These are my Fitbit Steps from this week, Mon 16th – Fri 20th The 8,770 and the 9,295 days were my days off and the 9,440 was the day I got a lift to work but made my own way home. so honestly not too bad I think. I have work again tomorrow. So now it’s just about getting my thoughts together, my diet back on track cause hell I still want to look good and feel good.

                 STOP MAKING EXCUSES KAT!!!!!!!!!

 

Has it REALLY been that long?

SO my last update to this blog was in October 2014… that was a whole 1 year and 3 months ago!!! In that time I lost over 2st upto July 2015…

After that I am ashamed to admit I just stopped caring. I just thought if I want to eat I’m going to. Work has been AWFUL which has far from helped. Stress is not a good reason to eat. in fact it is one of the worst…

Since I was last here I have piled back on the weight and there is a picture that struck fear into my heart and made me stick myself back on the diet cause I don’t want to be unhealthy and I do NOT want to be that FAT FRIEND!

So this is THE picture…

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I Cosplayed as a Harley Quinn in November’s MCM Birmingham… I look at myself and feel sick… How is that me??? Seriously? I have never looked at myself and HATED myself as much as I did when I first saw that!!!

So this is the deal. A very good friend of mine has challenged me to go up Snowdon with him in a couple months and then in a year’s time do it again and try and beat our time. So in order for me to not DIE going up (or coming back down) I NEED to do this!!!

I have Joined WeightWatchers online using their SmartPoints system and switched from cow’s milk to Almond (cause i’m not a huge fan of dairy anyway) I’m also moving to Wales soon so work stress should not be as bad, until the move I cannot weigh myself on my normal scales (that I trust with my life) so I’ve rounded up to a starting weight back up to 300lbs and my next weigh in will be the first day I have my scales in the new house…. So anything under 300lbs I will be happy with but with a minimum of about 6 weeks til then I am hoping to be no more than 285lbs…

I also have a new FitBit, my stats will be coming back… my New Fitbit is the FitBit Charge HR which I cannot recommend enough. It suits me for my days at work as it doubles as a watch and It monitors my sleep which I really need as I’m always tired.

 

 

So for now…

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And this time I’m going NOWHERE!!!

You can also Join me on my Fat to Fit Twitter – KatKit89
Or Instagram – katkit789
If you’re also part of the Connect section of the WW app you can follow me – katkit89

I hope you enjoy my Journey, feel free to yell at me at any time I feel like I’m failing.