So It was the 15th July the last time I was here. I said it would be 11 days to my next update After I got back from the homeland, Well It looks like I’m a big fat liar as here I am 65 days later.
Let’s cut to the chase, my week off was AWFUL, completely terrible, It’s a very long complicated story between my best friend and her now ex and her new bf… long story short, at the time of my birthday they had been split a matter of weeks, she was already seeing someone new and her and her ex were still living under the same roof… In order for me to get on with new bf my best friend had him there THE WHOLE time, I got like zero time to spend with her. Her new bf is a massive Douche, so being around him all the time stressed me out, out came the chocolate, crisps, cake and god knows whatever else. just another thing I cannot seem to switch off. But the highlight of the week was going out for dinner with an awesome friend. He even treated me for my birthday which was sweet. We went to a very nice pizza place, it was a Subway for Pizza haha. it was very nice and it was really nice to see him again, just a shame it wasn’t for long. That night I met up with some friends, went to a club and drank stupid amounts. Went out for a posh lunch the next day and by the time I got home I was scared to step on scales, I was scared to do anything and that included coming on here. I felt like I had failed myself AGAIN!!
What does any sane person do when they feel like a failure? yes, they hide. so that is what I did. Up until a couple weeks ago….
I decided I had had enough of hiding and avoiding what I was doing to myself, I stepped on the scales, I had put on 10lbs, that put me up to 295lbs. I wanted to cry and hide but then I had to remind myself, It could have been far far worse, I could be back to the 329lbs where I had started but I wasn’t. it was 10lbs and that is easy to control. I picked up my running shoes and headed down the beach, 3 times a week and got my lap down from 55min to 45min. I’m proud of that. the food side of things still need some work but I haven’t weighed myself since…
I am currently facing a massive hiccup which my help me food wise in the long run but I ended up being taken into hospital on the 5th September, Apparently I had a seizure, I say apparently because Mentally I wasn’t there… I woke up on the floor of a cafe then in an Ambulance and then again at the hospital. I lost my ability to form words which has been pretty scary at times but I’m getting there, speech is almost back to normal and I get to go home on Tuesday after 2 weeks. This set back has caused an issue for work, I was due to start at my new job on the 12th September but they have deferred it til November as I was ill. It was nice that they deferred but I am now income-less for 2 months… no gym! but on the upside I can now focus on myself, get my health back on track without having to worry about fitting it all around work for the time being.
So I think that pretty much covers it…
No more Hiding!!!