This is not an April Fool…

So here I am updating my blog for the first time in over 2 months (as it was pointed out to me… sorry 😦 )

So what’s been happening? I’ve been working long days and experiencing some issues that I believed were resulted in my hospital stay in September.

I’ve been going to WW meetings, actually being weighed by other people is scary, but I’m going, and still going, I had a few slip ups and I think that was stress, so in all I’ve lost 3lbs in the last 6 weeks,  I know it isn’t much but it’s something.

I saw my neurologist on Wednesday who thinks I’m suffering migraines which is causing all the issues i’m having so, i’m being put on medication for that. I’m so relieved. I can finally put my mind at rest.

So… This is just a quick update to say I am still here and still working on things.

And to celebrate spring… “Bikini body here I come” hahaha

🙂

Not the week I wanted but a good result…

I lost 4Lbs!!!

not the 14 I was aiming for but I was ill for a couple days, got sent home from work and well dropping out of routine does make things worse. but I lost the 2.5 i put on and then lost a lil more.

Not too shabby 🙂

Total loss of 5Lbs so far… but i start meetings Friday 3rd Feb.

I’ve set a new goal, 10Lbs to lose in 2 weeks – before Sunday 5th Feb. those 10lbs will mean I have lost 10% of weight in 1 whole year.

Which isn’t too bad after the rubbish back and forth I had from July til now.

wish me luck… couple more weeks til a picture comparison… *gulp*

I had a bad week…

Okay so I weighed in on Sunday…

+2Lbs

okay so it was a bad week BUT it’s only terrible if i let it get to me…
so I haven’t.

I’ve decided to leave my weeklies, concentrate on dailies (within 3 points below) and then if I really NEED my weeklies I shall have them in abundance… 
for example if i have a craving… better if I can settle that than to deprive myself… or if the guys from work invite me out for a meal, I’m safe. 

okay so the competition between my sister and I… I won the first round. 
It’s every fortnight so last weeks weigh in set a benchmark for this week’s…
My sister LOST 7.5LBS!!! and I put on 2! so in order to win the weigh this week, I have to lose 10lbs… PLUS 1lbs more than my sister does *gulp*

14lbs is a brave target – i’m aiming high but not going to dwell if i don’t make it.

🙂 

I’m getting there Slowly…

Slowly but surely I am getting there, I have lost 5lbs since coming out of hospital, it isn’t a lot but it’s coming down and that’s the main thing.

Being out of work is causing me far more stress and has made me far more depressed that I thought it would. I’ve cancelled my gym membership as I can no longer afford it but I have been trying to get out and run and as it gets colder the want and need to stay inside in the warm is ever increasing. but I keep trying, and the craving for chocolate has started to dwindle, Diet back on track, Exercise back on track and I’ll get there.

I’m not giving up. I refuse to give up. I’ve come too far to give up now.

wouldn’t say no to having someone nag me right now…

BUT I am getting there… Slowly….

What the Hell Happened?!?

So It was the 15th July the last time I was here. I said it would be 11 days to my next update After I got back from the homeland, Well It looks like I’m a big fat liar as here I am 65 days later.

Let’s cut to the chase, my week off was AWFUL, completely terrible, It’s a very long complicated story between my best friend and her now ex and her new bf… long story short, at the time of my birthday they had been split a matter of weeks, she was already seeing someone new and her and her ex were still living under the same roof… In order for me to get on with new bf my best friend had him there THE WHOLE time, I got like zero time to spend with her. Her new bf is a massive Douche, so being around him all the time stressed me out, out came the chocolate, crisps, cake and god knows whatever else. just another thing I cannot seem to switch off. But the highlight of the week was going out for dinner with an awesome friend. He even treated me for my birthday which was sweet. We went to a very nice pizza place, it was a Subway for Pizza haha. it was very nice and it was really nice to see him again, just a shame it wasn’t for long. That night I met up with some friends, went to a club and drank stupid amounts. Went out for a posh lunch the next day and by the time I got home I was scared to step on scales, I was scared to do anything and that included coming on here. I felt like I had failed myself AGAIN!!

What does any sane person do when they feel like a failure? yes, they hide. so that is what I did. Up until a couple weeks ago….

I decided I had had enough of hiding and avoiding what I was doing to myself, I stepped on the scales, I had put on 10lbs, that put me up to 295lbs. I wanted to cry and hide but then I had to remind myself, It could have been far far worse, I could be back to the 329lbs where I had started but I wasn’t. it was 10lbs and that is easy to control. I picked up my running shoes and headed down the beach, 3 times a week and got my lap down from 55min to 45min. I’m proud of that. the food side of things still need some work but I haven’t weighed myself since…

I am currently facing a massive hiccup which my help me food wise in the long run but I ended up being taken into hospital on the 5th September, Apparently I had a seizure, I say apparently because Mentally I wasn’t there… I woke up on the floor of a cafe then in an Ambulance and then again at the hospital. I lost my ability to form words which has been pretty scary at times but I’m getting there, speech is almost back to normal and I get to go home on Tuesday after 2 weeks. This set back has caused an issue for work, I was due to start at my new job on the 12th September but they have deferred it til November as I was ill. It was nice that they deferred but I am now income-less for 2 months… no gym! but on the upside I can now focus on myself, get my health back on track without having to worry about fitting it all around work for the time being.

So I think that pretty much covers it…

No more Hiding!!!

No stats week…

I’ve decided not to add my Fitbit stats this week, mainly because they are AWFUL! I had a really bad week, mostly due to the weather. When you have to walk everywhere you hate turning up to places soaked, so lack of gym, lifts to or from work has made hitting my goal harder. So this week is a fresh, it’s not been the best of starts but I think I have averaged out some stuff plus Saturday I’m travelling back to the homeland *YAY*

I do have some news to share, I was at work the other day and someone who had been on holiday for a week came back and she looked at me and said those wonderful words all of us on this journey get so excited to hear…

“wow, have you lost weight?”

I ended up grinning from ear to ear and I loved it!! A long with all you lovely people that can see a difference in my pictures, it’s a proper boost builder and lets me know that just because I can’t see it doesn’t mean it’s not happening.

If I get a chance I shall update on Saturday after weigh in (which I’m not expecting to be great this week after Family meals most of the week) otherwise It’ll be a very long update in about 11 days 🙂

Have a lovely Friday ❤

I went to the Gym, why am I not skinny yet??

CRISIS!

I’m struggling to get to the gym, I hate my job and it’s all crashing around me, still waiting for a start date on my new job and that’s kinda getting me down. All I want to do is shove my face inn a massive bowl of chocolate and only resurface for air…

BUT I WON’T!

I’ve come too far to go back now. I keep telling myself;

If Losing Weight Was Easy, Everybody Would Do It. 

I don’t want to give up, I want to keep going. I enjoy what is happening to my body and I want to be fit and healthy. Some days it feels as though it doesn’t matter what I do, it isn’t enough. I’ve lost 2 stone, which is incredible (especially for me) but There is still another 10 stone to go…

It will not happen over night, but I need something now, a new dress size, a nice comment… just something!